Therapy As Spiritual Practice

By Aimee Rai:

Integrative Therapist and Counsellor specialising in Trauma, Somatics & Classical Tantra

Students have often asked me how therapy and spiritual practice come together. Many initially struggle to bridge the two. They can seem like separate — even opposing — paths.

That is understandable because spirituality is often presented as something that transcends the need for therapy, as though Awakening itself should dissolve all wounds, patterns, and pain. Some teachers, even very respected ones, will at times reflect this directly, implying that if you are truly "spiritual", you shouldn’t need psychological support - which is a deeply shaming, frankly inaccurate, and decidedly unhelpful view. This can be particularly true in non-dual traditions (within which I practice) - because, if we understand the empty and malleable ultimate/quantum nature of Reality ... then we understand that we are not our story - right? The teachings, and my experience, suggest otherwise.

Karma and Samskaras — Trauma by Another Name

If we turn to the principle of karma, we can begin to understand a more nuanced view.

Karma does not mean that the difficult things that happen in life are punishments for past mistakes. Or for that matter, that if we are "good", then good things will happen. That is a reductionist misinterpretation of a rich and complex cosmic principle. At its core, karma is not reward and punishment (akin to a model of sin) but the teaching of cause and effect - the inevitable truth that one thing leads to another, that all experience is inseparable and interdependent.

In this context, its refers to the fact that the way we experience ourselves, others, and the world around us is entirely shaped by everything we have experienced up until that moment - the good the bad and the ugly - whether we remember cognitively or not. Ten people can experience exactly the same thing, and each will have a totally different response and reaction to that thing. This is karma. And our individual karmic web accumulated across billions of incarnations does not dissolve in its entirety upon contact with Ultimate Reality - no matter how much we like the idea of it or how many times we visit it. Buddhist teachings are clear about this - that Awakening comes in many stages, waves and layers over lifetimes. A teaching that I find to be helpful because it is humbling.

In yogic philosophy, samskaras are the imprints left by those experiences — the grooves in the mind, nervous system, and body that form our instinctive reactions, beliefs, and behaviours. Whether originated in this lifetime or another, they are unresolved and are being played out here through this lifetimes events and circumstances.

This is one way in which therapy becomes spiritual practice.

In therapy we begin to explore with enormous compassion and radical self honesty:

·        What are my experiences and how have they shaped my perception?

·        What patterns/loops am I unconsciously repeating/trapped in?

·        In what ways do I habitually react and why?

·        What energies/emotions are stuck in my body (subconscious) and how do they effect and drive me?

To explore these things is to begin to untangle our Self from our karma — to loosen the knots that keep us bound to past experience, to bring consciousness to what was unconscious (and therefore invisibly running the show). We have far less choice than we convince ourselves we do - we are running almost entirely on unconscious automation, constantly self justifying and afraid to investigate how we really are, and why. Its a very painful way to live actually, but for most of us its so familiar, its comfortable. It takes a lot of courage to make the descent in to soul. But its a worthwhile journey. I suspect its the only journey we are here to have.

Awakening Is Not a Philosophy nor an Experience

Awakening is not adopting a spiritual philosophy (however valuable), nor is it even the most profound mystical experience. We can have an earth shattering glimpse in to the nature of Ultimate Reality, and still not live from it. We can be in samadhi one minute, or surfing the cosmic tides in a plant medicine ceremony one day ... and still be impatient with our children, closed with our partners, dismissive of our pain, struggling with our doubt, arrogance, anxiety or overwhelm the next.

The real question is not how deep was our glimpse or how firm is our faith — but how deeply is it able to live through us in each moment?

Not just in meditation or in stillness, but in conflict, in tiredness, in stress, in love. Honestly. (Because spirituality is also one of the ego´s favourite things to shape itself around, so its easy to hide from the truth of this matter - but no growth of any value will arise until we stop.)

This is the real work of Awakening. The spiritual journey is just that, a journey - towards Truth being able to permeate our reactions, our relationships, and the way we exist in ordinary life. This principle is right at the heart of the classical Tantric traditions I practice within (namely Sri Vidya and Tibetan Buddhism). It takes time, devotion, discipline, and almost always, the love care, direction, insight and oversite of an experienced other. All traditions reflect this.

If we are serious about walking The Path with any depth we will need a qualified teacher within whatever tradition we feel at home, to guide us and our practice closely. But a therapist often becomes another vital ally - there to support our growing ability to see ourselves clearly and re-learn healthy ways of relating. We cannot see ourselves without a mirror. DIY healing can bring us far, but it is not without its limitations. This is why I believe that to work as a therapist or counsellor is a sacred role that requires more than learning dry analytic theory. Not every spiritual teacher has therapeutic skill and nor does every therapist know how to work with transpersonal considerations. Often we will need more than one person in our corner to watch for our blind spots and nurture us effectively.

Somatic therapy takes us beyond cognitive self-awareness. Many of us get stuck in awareness where we begin to see our patterns or psychological themes and maybe even begin to understand where they root from .. but find ourselves confounded by how little power we have to actually change them!

We need to grow what I call "the gap" — the almost invisible space between the old impulse or trigger and what follows - to move from unconscious compulsivity, to freedom and choice. In Buddhist teaching, this is echoed in the Twelve Nidanas — the chain of dependent arising that shows how suffering unfolds from contact to craving to compulsive action. This doesn't mean just delaying our response or acting more measured on the outside. We have to actually learn to first feel what is arising (interoception), then learn how to skilfully tend to the energy/emotion we recognise arising. Without developing these abilities we are bound to repeat endless cycles, with little opportunity to truly chose who we are, and how we live and move through the world.

As Carl Jung said, “Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.”

In my experience, therapy without spiritual context can become self-improvement without depth - people are often left with the felt sense that "something is still missing" - because the human condition is an inherently spiritual one. But equally, spirituality without therapeutic psychological support and process is often an escape in disguise. And I am not sure that's spirituality at all.

Its ok - wonderful actually - to get a little lost in the rush and romance of early spirituality, but at some point, our relationship to the Path needs to deepen and mature if we want it to bare fruit.

I don't believe a therapeutic approach is antithetical to a spiritual path. On the contrary, I believe that all sincere therapy is spiritual practice — whether we realise it at the time or not.

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Just after writing this article Aimee came across a wonderful (and somewhat unusual) conversation between renowned spiritual teacher Adyashanti and Trauma Specialist Dr Gabor Mate. She asked us to share it here to supplement her article in the hope that both would support and inspire many of you to engage with The Path with a truly holistic spirit.

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